he lists the personal experiences that led to his pessimism and that, in turn, formed the basis of his atheism: “The early loss of my mother, great unhappiness at school, and the shadow of the last war and presently the experience of it, had given me a very pessimistic view of existence. My atheism was based on it: and it still seems to me that far the strongest card in our enemies’ hand is the actual course of the world: and that, quite apart from particular evils like wars and revolutions. The inherent ‘vanity’ of the ‘creature,’ the fact that life preys on life, that all beauty and happiness is produced only to be destroyed—this was what stuck in my gullet.”

Nicholi, Armand (2002-04-03). The Question of God (p. 113). Simon & Schuster, Inc.. Kindle Edition.